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The Importance of the BRA…

Q: Which is the striped BRA? zeBRA
Q: Poisonous BRA? coBRA
Q: Mathematical BRA? algeBRA
Q: Sunsign BRA? liBRA
Q: Magical BRA? aaBRA ka daBRA
Q: Religious BRA? BRAhmin!
Q: Metallic bra? BRAss
Q: Anjelina Jolie’s Bra? BRAd pitt…
Q: Botany BRA? BRAnch
Q: Marketing BRA? BRAnd
Q: puctuation bra? BRAcket
Q: Scary bra? GhaBRAahat!!!!
Q: A room where BRA’s are kept? LiBRAry
Q: Bra which became the American President and inspired the whole
world? ABRAham Lincoln!
Q: Which bra is very important for any vehicle? BRAke
Q: Alcoholic BRA. BRAndy,
Q: Footballer’s BRA. BRAzil,
Q: Sun-shaded BRA. UmBRA,
Q: Fine-tuned BRA. BRAbus,
Q: BRA for Panicky Joes. GaBRA,
Q: Spanish BRA. AlhamBRA,
Q: Big-talkers’ BRA. BRAgger.
Q: Blind people’s BRA. BRAil.
Q: Professors’ BRA. BRAiny.
Q: Nudist BRA. BRAless.
Q: BRA for the wrist. BRAcelet.

AND U THOUGHT ONLY WOMEN USE A BRA ???!!

And, The FACT Is…

ADULT:
A person who has stopped growing at
both ends And is now growing in the middle.

BEAUTY PARLOR:
A place where women curl up and dye.

CHICKENS:
The only animals you eat before they are
born and after they are dead.

COMMITTEE:
A group that keeps minutes and wastes
hours.

DUST:
Mud with the juice squeezed out.

EGOTIST:
Someone who is usually me-deep in
conversation.

HANDKERCHIEF:
Cold Storage.

INFLATION:
Cutting money in half without damaging
the paper

MOSQUITO:
An insect that makes you like flies better.

RAISIN:
A grape with a sunburn.

SECRET:
Something you tell to one person at a
time
.
SKELETON:
A bunch of bones with the person
scraped off.

TOOTHACHE:
The pain that drives you to extraction.

TOMORROW:
One of the greatest labour saving devices
of today

YAWN:
An honest opinion openly expressed.

And MY Personal Favorite!

WRINKLES:
Something other people have,
similar to my character lines.

¸.•♥ •thinking about u• ♥•.¸

1. Somewhere out there beneath the pale moon light someone thinking of u somewhere out there where dreams come true…

2. Yesterday whole night i was
thinking abt U
Only n only U
U
U
And only U
Now I m thinking abt V
.
.
.
.
.
Tonight i ll think abt W X Y &
Z…!!!

3. Look at sun and you see time.
Look in heart and you see love.
Look in eyes and you see life.
Look at your mobile and you see who’s thinking of u!
It’s me.

4. My heart says that you like me,
My eyes says that you feel something for me,
My mind says that you think of me,
But till now you are quiet….

5. Whenever u feel a cluster of joy, it may be coz angles r dancing over u but wenever u smile without any reason at all it may be coz im thinking of you..!

6. All I wanted was sum1 2 care 4 me
All I wanted was sum1 who’d b there 4 me
All I ever wanted was sum1 who’d b true
All I ever wanted was sum1 like U…

7. In the morning I don’t eat bcoz I think of U, at noon I don’t eat bcoz I think of U, in the evening I don’t eat bcoz I think of U, at night I don’t sleep bcoz I’m hungry.

8. All I wanted was sum1 2 care 4 me
All I wanted was sum1 who’d b there 4 me
All I ever wanted was sum1 who’d b true
All I ever wantedwas sum1 like U…

9. THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
WHY SPEND LIFE SUFFERING N TALKING PAINS TO GET RICH TO WEAR RICH BRANDED CLOTHES WHEN D BEST THINGS IN LIFE HAPPEN WHEN NAKED

10. Thought of d day: A successful man is 1 who makes more money than his wife can spent.. & A successful women is 1 who can find such a man….

11. A man who surrenders when he’s WRONG, is HONEST. A man who surrenders when he’s NOT SURE, is WISE. A man who surrenders when he’s RIGHT, is a HUSBAND

12. THOUGHT FOR THE DAY :
“Marry and make a woman happy…. OR remain a bachelor and make several women happy…!!”*

13. Todays Thought: Try hard to get what u like (or) you will be forced to like what u get…

14. Thought for the day , Never cry when you are in LOVE. B’coz
for thee one whom you cry, doesn’t deserve your tears. And the one who deserves it, will never let you CRY….

15. Daily v r interested 2 open Inbox & read so many messages But How many times v open QURAN daily & How many SURAH v read? Think..
Respect ALLAH more than ur Cell. QURAN will support us on judgement day. Not the Cell. So Insha allah read QURAN daily with meaning. More than the Cell, Plz fwd to all..

16. What greater thing is there for two human souls that to feel that they are joined… to strengthen each other… to be at one with each other in silent unspeakable memories.

17. Wastes of Lives—resown with Colors By Succeeding Springs— Death—unto itself—Exception — Is exempt from Change—

18. All but Death, can be Adjusted— Dynasties repaired— Systems—settled in their Sockets— Citadels—dissolved—

19. Hi! Thinking abt me? COOL!I am doing the same thing!
I am also thinkin abt myself! :))

20. I lukd back coz I thought I saw U.I listned eagerly coz I thoght I heard U,Bt No 1 ws around.Dis made me Realize hw much’I THINK ABOUT U’

21.
.:::. My
( ‘.’ ) heärt
(“¤”),)
‘v’¿J
never gets tired remembering speciÄL peÖpLe who live in my heart like U…

22. You’ll always be the answer, when someone asks me what I’m thinking about.

23. Som1 Remembrs, Somebody Cares. Your name is Whispered in som1’s Prayers. Keep the Bright Hope of Sunshine in View. Som1 is Warmly THINKING of U..

24. THOUGHT OF THE DAY.
Dont be like the hand that crushes the flower But be like the crushed flower which leaves fragrance in the hand that crushed it…

25. Dont sent any messages, i dontwant 2 see u, 2 hear ur voice, 2 think of u, ‘coz my doctor advised me 2 keep away 4m SWEETS

26. God has given us 24 hours to spent a day8 hours to sleep 8 hours to work and 8 hours to spent time with our family But I spend the 24 hours thinking of you

27. Ask my eyes to stop looking at you… Ask my brain to stop
thinking about you.. Ask my imagination to stop dreaming
about you.. Ask my heart to stop beating..ask me everything.. But don’t u ever stop me from loving you.

28.
()”..”()
( , o ) WHAT R
(_3E_) Doing?
()”” ..() LET
(“”( ,o ) ME C…
( E.)
()”..”()
( (“”) )
( v e _)
Aaila! Thinking of me!
Choo Chweet!

29. If u feel a bit dizzy and u r craving something sweet , i
think i …. know what’s wrong…… you are suffering from lack of
vitamin ME 🙂

30. if a smile reaches ur lips. a perfect smile dat u perhaps u cnt explain. remember dat in dat moment, im thinkin of u &smilin too.

31. If YOU are filling DIZZY, a lot SICK, a bit QUIET, a little bit SAD…. I think what’s wrong. U are suffering from a lack of VITAMIN ME!

32. Check your balance dear, i think it is very Low, Bcoz you send 1 message for 5 times. 😛

33. Be a diode to remove -ve thinking,A transistor to amplify the Character…. A resistor to drop Badhabits,A capacitor to store Good thoughts….

34. Good time, bad time, night time, day time, work time, off time, sad time, happy time, in the mean time i’m thinking of you all the time.

35. When I’m older, I’ll look back at all of my crowning memories, and think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you.

36. Fate brought the both of us together. So naturally when you look at us, you will think we match each other. Coz we are make to be for each other.

37. If I would get a rose for every time I think of you, I would spend every day in a rose garden, … thinking of you

38. So when your lonely, remember its true that some1, somewhere, is thinking of u

39. 1 min, 1 hr, 1 day, 1 wk, 1 mth, 1 yr, no matter how long, I’ll treasure the times we’ve spent together!

40. I do not think much, i do not think often, but when I think, I think of you!

41. If I had a single flower for every time I thought of you I could walk in my garden forever, never finding the end.

42. When u were born, u were crying and everyone round u was smiling.. Live ur life so that when u die, u’re the one who is smiling and everyone round u is crying..

¸.•♥ •double meaning sms• ♥•.¸

1. What’s An Average 6 Inch
Long
Inside A Guy’s Pants And Girls
Love To Blow It Up?
A:1000- Rupee Currency Note.!
Always Think POSITIVE

2. To make it straight,
she pulls it.
2 make it stand,
she rubs it.
2 make it stiff,
she licks it.
2 let it “IN”
she pushes it.
!!!!
True! Threading a needle is not
easy!!!

3. Bite the neck gently,
Chew the breast softly,
Spread the legs slowly,
Suck the juice excitingly,
That is the way to eat Tandoori
Chicken!!!!

4. KISSING at the top,HOLDING
at the middle &FIRE at the
bottom!
Do you know the ANSWAR?
WHAT?
ho…don’t think dirty…
its A ”CIGRETTE”

5. I’m very good in bed…
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
..
I can sleep all day…
What Were U Thinking . . . ;->

6. A Beautiful Girl Goes To
Professior Room
And
Say : I’ll Do AnyThing To Pass In
The Exams. . . .
&
Professor Says:
NOW OPEN YOUR
Books & Study. . . . ;->

7. Last nite i coodnt sleep.i
wantd u warm against my skin.i
wantd u on me.i wantd 2 feel u
all over my body.. but i coodnt
find u!Where did i put my
PYJAMAS?

8. Shut Up”””
S=surprises 4 u
H=happiness 4 u
U=unlimited love 4 u
T=true passion 4 u
U=u alwayz in my mind
P=praying 4 u
So again..
Shut Up……

9. Girl: What do you like in me?
Boy: Those who white big balls
having black dots in it.
Girl: Whattt???
Boy: Yes i like your eyes. Its
really beautiful..

10. fuck off
f
u
c
k off
yes fuck off
ooh. dont get the wrong
meaning.
fuck off means:
F-friend like
U- u
C-can
K-keep
O-our
F-friendship
F-forever..

11. Hold It Gently
Put 2 Fingrs
If Dey Dnt
Fit
Fos Dem In
If De Hole‘s Big Enaf
Put3
Muv Up & Down
Slowly..
Ooh Yes..
Can U Fil It?
Dats How U Wash A Glass

12. I want to touch ur lips taste
ur tongue smell ur breath
hai wat hapen
i am ur colgate

13. Diagram in book was not
clear..So,madam drew diagram
on blackboard and
announced.. “Don‘t look at Book
Figure, Look at my Figure!“

14. He took me from a bar. He
took me in his car. He took my
top off. He puts his lips on mine,
but don’t worry: I’m a bottle of
wine!

15. Ques. What is the difference
between a pregnant woman
and a light bulb?
Ans. U can unscrew a light bulb

16. How do u teach a blonde
maths?U subtract her chlothes
Devide her legsAnd square root
her.

17. He took me from a bar. He
took me in his car. He took my
top off. He puts his lips on mine,
but don’t worry: I’m a bottle of
wine!

18. I luv the way it rubs aganst
the soft pink flesh creating
creamy fomy liquid, as it trust
in and out up & down, cant wait
till nxt time my toothBrush

19. Boy:what is that u keep in
ur mouth
which is 6″ long
and move it in and out
and wait for a white substance
to come out?
Girl: y do u ask such question to
me.
i cant tell such words
Boy:dont worry its tooth brush

20. It’s the thing that satisfies
ur mind, body & soul!
Do it on bed, on a sofa,
in the car or anywhere!
It’s called Prayer!
God bless ur naughty mind.

21. True Love is like a pillow.
U could HUG it when Ur in
trouble.
U could CRY on it when Ur in
pain.
U could EMBRACE it when Ur
happy.
Want True Love?
Spend Rs.50 buy a Pillow.

22. he Is Hot!
She Is Sweet!
She Always Need A Lip 4 Kiss
Whole World Mad 4 Her!
Who!
Who Is She?
Do U Know?
“Tea”

23. “U” r so cute
“U” r so Nice
when i was in Dark
“U” gave me light
because of that
“U” r in my Life
so
THANKS’
THANKS
A LOT
“PHILIPS”
TUBELIGHT.

24. I want to tell u this!!
And its very
important to u
I L
I LO
I LOVE
I LOVE YO
I LOVE YOGURT WITH BIRYANI !!

25. I want u …
To be with me In a nice
Restaurent
To have candle light dinner…. &
to say those sweet three words
to U ….
“Pay The Bill”

26. My eyes detected
My heart reacted
Thousand were rejected &
Only you were selected.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Because I needed a monkey
for an advertisement.

Hi guys, have fun!!!

THIS MAY BE DIFFICULT FOR ALL WHO ARE OVER 60 .THOSE YOUNGER THAN THIS
WILL HAVE NO HOPE AT ALL.

DEMENTIA QUIZ

FIRST QUESTION:

YOU ARE A PARTICIPANT IN A RACE. YOU OVERTAKE
THE SECOND PERSON. WHAT POSITION ARE YOU IN?

ANSWER : IF YOU ANSWERED THAT YOU ARE FIRST,
THEN YOU ARE ABSOLUTELY WRONG! IF YOU OVERTAKE THE
SECOND PERSON AND YOU TAKE HIS PLACE, YOU ARE IN SECOND PLACE!

TRY TO DO BETTER NEXT TIME.
NOW ANSWER THE SECOND QUESTION,
BUT DON’T TAKE AS MUCH TIME AS
YOU TOOK FOR THE FIRST QUESTION, OK?

SECOND QUESTION:
IF YOU OVERTAKE THE LAST PERSON, THEN YOU ARE….?
(SCROLL DOWN)

ANSWER: IF YOU ANSWERED THAT YOU ARE SECOND TO LAST, THEN YOU ARE…..
WRONG AGAIN. TELL ME SUNSHINE, HOW CAN YOU OVERTAKE THE LAST PERSON??

YOU’RE NOT VERY GOOD AT THIS, ARE YOU?

THIRD QUESTION:
VERY TRICKY ARITHMETIC! NOTE:
THIS MUST BE DONE IN YOUR HEAD ONLY.
DO NOT USE PAPER AND PENCIL OR A CALCULATOR.
TRY IT.

TAKE 1000 AND ADD 40 TO IT. NOW ADD ANOTHER 1000 NOW ADD 30.
ADD ANOTHER 1000. NOW ADD 20 .. NOW ADD ANOTHER 1000.
NOW ADD 10. WHAT IS THE TOTAL?

SCROLL DOWN FOR THE CORRECT ANSWER…..

DID YOU GET 5000?

THE CORRECT ANSWER IS ACTUALLY 4100…

IF YOU DON’T BELIEVE IT, CHECK IT WITH A CALCULATOR!
TODAY IS DEFINITELY NOT YOUR DAY, IS IT?

MAYBE YOU’LL GET THE LAST QUESTION RIGHT…. MAYBE…

FOURTH QUESTION:

MARY’S FATHER HAS FIVE DAUGHTERS:

1. NANA, 2. NENE, 3. NINI, 4.. NONO, AND ???

2 WHAT IS THE NAME OF THE FIFTH DAUGHTER?

DID YOU ANSWER NUNU? NO! OF COURSE IT ISN’T.
HER NAME IS MARY! READ THE QUESTION AGAIN!

OKAY, NOW THE BONUS ROUND,
I.E., A FINAL CHANCE TO
REDEEM YOURSELF:

A MUTE PERSON GOES INTO A SHOP AND WANTS TO BUY A TOOTHBRUSH.
BY IMITATING THE ACTION OF BRUSHING HIS TEETH HE
SUCCESSFULLY EXPRESSES HIMSELF TO THE SHOPKEEPER AND THE PURCHASE IS
DONE.

NEXT, A BLIND MAN COMES INTO THE SHOP WHO WANTS TO BUY A
PAIR OF SUNGLASSES; HOW DOES HE INDICATE WHAT HE WANTS?

IT’S REALLY VERY SIMPLE
HE OPENS HIS MOUTH AND ASKS FOR IT…
DOES YOUR EMPLOYER ACTUALLY PAY YOU TO THINK??
IF SO DO NOT LET THEM SEE YOUR ANSWERS FOR THIS TEST!

PASS THIS ON TO FRUSTRATE THE
SMART PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE!

HAVE A NICE DAY, ONE AND ALL.

Call Center Problems

Tech Support: What kind of computer do you have?
Customer: A white one.
…………………………………………
.Customer: Hi, this is Celine. I can’t get my DVD out !!!
Tech Support: Have you tried pushing the button?
Customer: Yes, I’m sure it’s really stuck.
Tech Support: That doesn’t sound good; I’ll make a note.
Customer: No, wait a minute, I hadn’t inserted it yet. It’s still on my desk . . .. sorry. Thank you.
……………………………………….
.Tech Support: Click on the ‘MY COMPUTER’ icon on the
left of the screen.
Customer: Your left or my left?
………………………………………..
.Tech Support: Hello. How may I help you?
Male Customer: Hi .. . . I can’t print.
Tech Support: Would you click on ‘START’ for me and .. ..
Customer: Listen pal; don’t start getting technical on me. I’m not Bill Gates!!!
………………………………………..
.Customer: Good afternoon, this is Martha. I can’t print. Every time I try, it says . . . ‘CAN’T FIND PRINTER’. I even lifted the printer and placed it
in front of the monitor, but the computer still says it can’t find it!!!
………………………………………..
.Customer: I have problems printing in red.
Tech Support: Do you have a color printer?
Customer: Aaaah . . . . . .. . . . . thank you.
…………………………………………
.Tech Support: What’s on your monitor now, ma’am?
Customer: A teddy bear that my boyfriend bought for me at the 7-11 store.
………………………………………..
.Customer: My keyboard is not working anymore.
Tech Support: Are you sure your keyboard is plugged into the computer?
Customer: No. I can’t get behind the computer.
Tech Support: Pick up your keyboard and take ten steps backwards.
Customer: Okay..
Tech Support: Did the keyboard come with you?
Customer: Yes.
Tech Support: That means the keyboard is not plugged
in. Is there another keyboard?
Customer: Yes, there’s another one here. Wait a moment please. . .. . . . . Ah, that one does work. Thanks.
……………………………………….
.Tech Support: Your password is the small letter ‘a’ as in
apple, a capital letter ‘V’ as in Victor, and the number ‘7’.
Customer: Is that ‘7’ in capital letters?
…………………………………………
.Customer: I can’t get on the Internet.
Tech Support: Are you absolutely sure you used the correct password?
Customer: Yes, I’m sure I saw my co-worker do it.
Tech Support: Can you tell me what the password was?
Customer: Five dots.
……………………………………….
.Tech Support: What anti-virus program do you use?
Customer: Netscape
Tech Support: That’s not an anti-virus program.
Customer: Oh, sorry . . . Internet Explorer.
…………………………………………
.Customer: I have a huge problem! My friend has placed a screen saver on my computer . . .. but, every time I move my mouse, it disappears.
………………………………………..
.Tech Support: How may I help you?
Customer: I’m writing my first email.
Tech Support: OK, and what seems to be the problem?
Customer: Well, I have the letter ‘a’ in the address, but how do I get the little circle around it.
…………………………………………
.A woman customer called the Canon help desk because she had a problem with her printer..
Tech Support: Are you running it under windows?
Customer: No, my desk is next to the door, but that is a good point. The man sitting next to me is by a window, and his printer is working fine!
…………………………………………
.
.And last, but not least … . .

Tech Support: Okay Bob, press the control and escape keys at the same time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now, type the letter ‘P’ to bring up the Program Manager.
Customer: I don’t have a ‘P’.
Tech Support: On your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: What do you mean ?
Tech Support: ‘P’ . . . on your keyboard, Bob.
Customer: I AM NOT GOING TO DO THAT!!!

SINCERE THOUGHTs

Sincere Thought 1

Everyone in the wedding ceremony was watching the radiant bride as her father escorted her down the aisle to give away to the groom. They reached the altar and the waiting groom; the bride kissed her father and placed something in his hand. Everyone in the room was wondering what was given to the father by the bride.
The father could feel the suspense in the air and all eyes were on him to divulge the secret and say something. So he announced :
‘Ladies and Gentlemen. Today is the luckiest day of my life …’ Then he raised his hands with what his daughter gave him and continued, ‘My daughter finally, finally returned my Credit Card to me.’
The whole audience including the priest started laughing . . . . . But not the poor Groom ! ! !

Sincere Thought 2

A Man was walking down a street when he heard a voice from behind, ‘If you take one more step, a brick will fall down on your head and kill you.’
The man stopped and a big brick fell right in front of him. The man was astonished. He went on, and after a while he was going to cross the road. Once again the voice shouted, ‘Stop ! Stand still ! If you take one more step a car will run over you, and you will die.’
The man did as he was instructed, just as a car came careening around the corner, barely missing him. The man asked. ‘Who are you?’
‘I am your guardian angel,’ the voice answered.
‘Oh, yeah?’ the man said ‘And where the hell were you when I got married?